Me. Day 3. 


“What did you learn? What’s changed?? What was your grand takeaway???” These are just a few of the questions I’ve been asked. 

Sighs.

Business as usual… Overloaded schedules with bills and budgets, homework and papers, mothering and adulting all bombard my iCal. If I’m honest, post mission is rather depressing. 

On quest to understand just what exactly it is I’m experiencing after having spent 9 days traveling with my team advocating education, I came across a lovely article from my now new friends, Prepare My Mission. I don’t believe I could have said it any better than these guys did in this piece

  1. Exhaustion 
  2. Depression 
  3. Cultural Frustration 
  4. Resolution 

I’m very much a free spirit. Day 3 post our mission to Panamá & Costa Rica, I’m already experiencing high levels of both 2 & 3. 

What does this mean? This means that how I’ve been designed (if your interested in knowing), my love for God, His people and His planet have bombarded me with direct impulses of adjustment. 

When asked what’s changed; EVERYTHING! I can’t (not won’t) see the world the same, my kids the same, the food I eat or even books I read the same.

Everything’s changed! 

I can’t find it in me to follow the same people, advocate for the same causes or bleed for justice without being true to now what I’m considering to be a real me. A me that my soul, not even surprising, finds all too familiar… Who I was inside before humanity touched me with its insecurities and frailties and branded me as their own.

I’m a 36 year old woman. No longer a child and no longer a girl. The descesions I make aren’t for the betterment of anyone but me. Jumping right on over the “that’s selfish” judgment zone and landing in the “that’s valid, boo” runway, the selfish bones in my body are reserved for people and places most know nothing about. I am human too. 

I promise you, however, this is anything BUT a “I’m a woman, hear me roar,” piece. This here is simply, “I am me and I like me.” This me. Not the me you think you know. Not the me that used to be. Me- today. If you don’t know that me, it’s safe to say, you really don’t know me at all. #BrandThat! Get to know… me.

Nothing’s the same and nothing stays the same. A sign of true change is when you know better and DO better. Not for an audience… for you. And when you handle you in the way your Image Bearer designed you, you will see that focusing on you is the most selfless thing you can do for this world. A better you means better results on whatever you do, whoever you meet and wherever you go. 

#AMinWMo: Post anything major and life giving or taking takes adjustments. Be patient with yourself, be patient with others. Love unconditionally, forgive with conviction.

#BigGirlRant: Sometimes all you need is a little space and a little support. Surround yourself with people that are about YOU. Stop giving your energy to confused admires. You know the ones. 

Love & light,

Mónica 

4 thoughts on “Me. Day 3. 

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