dream big
Over the weekend I read Bob Goff’s book “Dream Big.” The word dream has been floating around my space as of late. It isn’t particularly my word of choice. In full transparency, it actually scares me. It puts me in a position to consider things outside of my control that make me nervous. Dreaming big makes me nervous.
— What does dreaming big look like? More work? Please God, not more work?!
It’s the only way I can describe homeschooling. The limitations and expectations I place on myself scare me. It forces me to confront those real insecurities that scream for my attention and rob me/us from our intended goal or passion. Homeschooling puts me in a position to be fully dependent on God and fully vulnerable to His strength made perfect in my weakness. I simply can’t do it without constantly reminding myself the years are not long enough.
My oldest graduates from high school this year. What?! Zechariah turns 18. Insert my “what?! face.” You know the one. The years just aren’t enough.
A dear friend of mine reached out to a few of us asking for prayer as she launched her first arrow today. Her daughter is off to another state for an internship then off to other school and career endeavors. TODAY. Her arrow, (daughter) just turned 18. As I read her words via text, I heard her heart. And I felt it in my core. The years just aren’t enough.
As we move on to the second semester of our third year homeschooling, I breathe in deep and exhale just as deep. The days are so long, but the reward in my heart can never compete with any other life mission I have been entrusted with. It just means that much to me. And it’s this journey that keeps me fully dependent on God.
As I read Bob Goff’s words I was intrigued by his willingness to put his phone number in the back of every book. It made me laugh how he openly shared the phone number to the White House and his account when he attempted to call and talk to the Queen of England. His encouragement to all of this was simply, “know what you’re going to say.” If I were to call Mr. Goff today, what would I say? What would I respond to anyone who asks, “what is your dream?”
Recently, a friend challenge me about dreaming too small. And guess what happend. The exact thing I said in the beginning of this blog post. Dreaming scares the heck out of me! But I’ll tell you one thing. Since then, I’ve not stopped seeing the word, and not by choice! It’s actually looking for me.
Today, I scroll back through my camera roll and I am reminded that these faces love Ms. Mo and I love them so much more. I get to teach my son’s third grade Science class. I am not “equipped” for this but I was MADE for this. And there’s a difference. Each year I dream big when I say yes to homeschool again. I dream big when I put together my lesson plans and purchase curriculum. I dream big when I host book clubs and Bible studies and host brunches. What makes this year different is that I’m no longer afraid. I feel… ready.
Let’s dream BIG together, sis. You’re worth it! We’re worth it!
Love always,
Mo
